Author: Lauren Bell

I wish you prosperity in all of your life; in love, joy, health, freedom, money, success, beauty, fun, whatever you are dreaming of.

So 2018 has come and gone, my how quickly time flies.

I love this time of the year to stop, reflect, not do too much, to withdraw from electronics, read a novel, nap, do whatever feels right in my mind and body.

The Christmas holidays whether I am away on vacation or just enjoying time at home is the only time of the year that I actually allow myself to stop and rest and have no plans at all.

Each day during my morning ritual I will see what is my inspired action for the day is and will set that as my intention. At this time of the year, it may be read a novel by the pool for at least 1 hour maybe even 4!

And in fact, this year I did that. I read for longer and have finished my book. I loved it, not the book (it was an average read). I loved the time and space and freedom that I allowed myself.

You see even though I am a big promoter of taking responsibility for self-care, I have recognised that most of my self-care is actions, things I do, such as walking Ruby through the local nature reserve, receiving a facial, a pedicure or a back massage. I am naturally a doer, always taking action so for me the real test, and rest is to stop and just be.

The truth is I do find it hard to stop and rest.

I have become conscious of my inner critical voice that is constantly nagging, always harping, and never satisfied. This voice when I rest doesn’t feel comfortable. I may get 15 minutes if I’m lucky, but before I’ve really settled into this me time, I’m reminded of all the things I need to do. And then so easily, my voice wins, I give up and go back to doing again.

The problem with this though is I never get the rest and time out that I am craving.

Eventually, because I haven’t nurtured myself in the way I truly need I find myself waking through the night or in the early morning in a state of overwhelm and stress, not with the refreshed and ready to go feeling that I should have after a good nights sleep.

This puts me into a state of I can’t be bothered, exhausted, listless, and I ask myself, “Why am I pushing so hard? Why bother?” It feels uncomfortable, I am in victim mode, poor me, powerless and complaining.

I use myriad of things that helps me move through this state, but mostly it is about honouring how I feel, accepting how I feel and loving myself deeply and completely anyway…more about that later.

The point I am making here is the need to actually stop and rest and be in the feminine, receiving mode, just being and appreciating just because I deserve it; I need it.

I need it regularly, more often, the balance to my doing, doer, masculine energy.

And, the truth is I’ll get more done, I’ll achieve more because my cup is filled, I’m in balance, happier and more energetic.

I don’t make New Year’s resolutions because they don’t work.

I do visualise and dream up my desires and how I want to feel and I create my More Of’s list. More of’s are all the things, feelings, experiences you would love more of in your life.

So my first More Of for 2019 is to have more being time, no pressure, nothing to do, just be, maybe journalling, maybe meditating, maybe sitting in the sun, maybe smelling and loving the flowers, maybe watching the sunrise or sunset, or maybe sitting with my back against a big, beautiful tree.

It sounds heavenly.

^{Beautiful Big Gum Bendigo Botanical Gardens}

The Christmas holiday season is already upon us. And with it comes the hope that this one will be truly magical.

Although Christmas is a time for love and connection with family and friends, singing carols and connecting deeply spiritually, celebrating this year’s achievements and objectively reviewing how the year panned out, I find it sneaks up on me.

Many of us quickly get bogged down in busyness, stress and old patterns.

This morning I decided to do something different, to honestly identify the negative self-talk and limiting beliefs that I have leading up to Christmas. This is so that I can choose to do something different this year.

These are just a few examples of ‘worries’ that I uncovered:

• The hassle of finding and putting up the decorations and decluttering the house to fit them in.
• Eating too much at Christmas and New Year’s and putting on extra weight.
• Spending money that feels tight and wanting to be more generous than I am.
• Deciding on what presents to buy for my loved ones.
• Feeling that I am too busy, too tired, that there is too much preparation.

Do you relate to these? Do you have other ones too?

Give yourself a moment to become really clear on what it is that stresses you about this holiday season. There is so much more peace in awareness because then you can choose to do something different.

Here are 10 ways to turn that dynamic around and create the magic.

• 1. Give yourself a break. Perfection—even perfect happiness—just isn’t possible. Let your best be good enough. Make a budget for both your time and your money—and stick to it. It really is the thought that counts.
• 2. Make conscious decisions. Get clear about what you really want to do over the holidays before compromising with others. If you don’t have a clear plan and clear intentions, you might find yourself getting swept along by others’ desires. Even if you compromise later, get clear first.
• 3. Shorten your to-do list. What do the holidays mean to you? For many, it’s about family and friends and spirituality. If an item doesn’t add to your holiday spirit, scratch it off.
• 4. Say no when you want to. It’s very liberating. Try it and see. It sounds simple, but too often obligation trumps desire. When faced with options, choose the one that would make you happier. If you can’t avoid certain events, limit the time you’re there.
• 5. Take good care of yourself. The old standards help keep stress at bay: eat healthfully, exercise, drink lots of water, and breathe deeply. Schedule time for relaxation and fun.
• 6. Start early. To avoid a last-minute frenzy that can bust your budget, start shopping or making presents now.
• 7. Ask for help. Reject any notion of martyrdom. The burden of preparations should not fall upon one person. The more specific you are in your request, the more successful you’ll be.
• 8. Establish new traditions. If you have experienced a major life-changing event, such as a death or divorce, consider doing something you’ve never done before over the holidays, such as travel to another country or take a cruise.
• 9. Do your own Personal Peace Procedure.
  Here’s a quick overview of how to do your own Personal Peace Procedure
  • Identify your limiting beliefs, things that have happened that you wish had not happened, worries about things that might or might not happen. Write them all down, one idea per line, on your personal peace list.
  • Rate them out of ten on the stress scale, 0 being no stress and 10 being maximum stress.
  • Each day tap on one item on your list (the highest rating on the stress scale). Rate it again now that you are about to tap on it, and keep tapping and assessing until you can get your stress level down to at least 2.
  • Notice any ah ha’s or insights that arise from your tapping and journal those in your peace procedure journal.
  • You will find that after tapping for a few days the overall stress level for many of the other identified beliefs or memories will have come down too. Keep choosing an item to tap the stress down and you will enjoy an improved level of peace and acceptance that carries over into other parts of your life.
• 10. Get support. If a glorious holiday season feels completely out of reach, you may experience the holiday blues. Many people do. Don’t beat yourself up for feeling that way. Reach out for the support you need.

Call me on +61 409 1715 77 for any support you need.

Email me: [email protected]

And have an Extraordinary Christmas Holiday Season.

How often do we see the gift and blessings that came out of difficult times?

The proverb ‘Every cloud has a silver lining’ can be traced back to at least early 17th Century. It reminds us that difficult times do pass and that there is something positive to be found in negative situations.

Life can be so difficult. When we are in the midst of tough times it is easy to be engulfed by the feelings it evokes and the meanings we ascribe to it.

And although we do know that things will pass with time it is important to feel and experience the depth of what we are going through. Otherwise, we are just band-aiding the pain that needs to be healed and it will continue to rise up until we do deal with it.

Looking back at some of the most difficult times in my life I realise they were times that I experienced the most profound growth.

Although the pain was great it allowed me to make difficult decisions that I had been avoiding. I was able to finally face, to stop and listen to what my heart was telling me.

Many times I had a 180-degree turn in my understanding, in my courage, in my self-deserving.

I do believe in a Universe that happens for you, not to you, so at some level, there is always soul growth and expansion occurring even when it seems as though this can’t be so.

My love to you if you are on that difficult road right now and I pray you get to experience the silver lining soon.

Too often we limit ourselves, play small, hide behind masks, pleasing others and avoiding conflict, trying to get along and live an ‘easy’ life.

We are on the sidelines not on the court of life.

This mostly unconscious behaviour is following someone else’s rules and programming (from family and the society we live in and belong to). Mostly we don’t even question it until it becomes too hard, too uncomfortable or deeply painful to continue pretending as if all is ok.

I have been there too; I know it doesn’t have to be this way.

This is why I am so passionate to help and show beautiful, amazing people with big hearts, who lack the confidence to ask for what they need. People who know they have much to give, that they are here for a purpose, but who hide and find it difficult to be seen, to speak up and be heard and to be appreciated as they truly deserve.

As a therapist, I help you to understand, accept and clear past programming and traumas to become more aware, peaceful and liberated to choose differently. As a coach I get you moving forward with certainty to deliberately live with freedom and authenticity, to fully express yourself with confidence and clarity. The life that serves you in all ways: physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, in relationships with Self and with others, in your wealth and lifestyle.

Passionate for holistic health and wellness – body, mind, and spirit, I am an uplifter and motivational coach who uses therapy, coaching and workshops to move you forward and live the life you dreamed of; ‘An Extraordinary Life’.

Are you fed up? Do you need to step up boldly and confidently to transform your life in areas where you feel stuck, frustrated and alone?

Call me +61409171577      I would love to chat with you.

Let’s make Your Life Extraordinary

Email [email protected]